Was it worth it? Cocooning from a Grandparent Perspective


This is written by my mom regarding her thoughts on our cocooning process. For more about our cocooning history with our adopted son Israel, check out this link for posts. 

After experiencing five births of previous grandchildren, I must say our experience with cocooning was quite different. We had been told about cocooning before our grandson, Israel, arrived. We agreed to abide by our daughter and son in law’s wishes to not come and visit at first. This in itself was hard as we had waited two long years for Israel. 

We were able to see Israel when he arrived at the airport. When we were later allowed to visit with them, we were told that we were not allowed to reach for him, kiss him, hold him, feed him or love on him as the parents needed to build a special bond with our grandson. Israel needed to look to his parents to meet his needs. This was hard for me because I love being a “hands on” grandparent.

My daughter shared with us that healing needed to take place in Israel’s little heart He was left at an orphanage and then taken from there to his new home. My daughter carried eight month old Israel in an “ergo” baby carrier for hours at a time. I feared her own health would break because she had so little time to rest. 

Was this hard on grandparents? Yes! I wanted to help my daughter. It seemed unnatural to keep my distance from my grandchild. I wanted to lavish love on him. But the result has been remarkable. Today, Israel is the sweetest, happiest, most well adjusted little fellow. I am sure this time of cocooning instilled in him a sense of love and security he needed. There is a sacrifice that comes with cocooning to all involved, but it is well worth it.


  1. I love this!! We cocooned with both of our children that were adopted from ET (ages 6 & 2) and while I understood it was hard for grandparents and extended family, it was also sacrifice for our family and difficult! It is good to hear from a grandparent's view and so glad she can see the benefits will last a lifetime!!!


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