On Not Comparing

I felt this tug on my heart the first time Edith rolled over, when she was just 3 months old. It was a bittersweet ache, to celebrate her milestone yet feel sad that Israel didn't have that too. It's happened again and again as we watch Edith do things that Israel still can't do, or catch on to things that we have had to work so hard to get him to figure out. Will and I told each other early on with Edith that we had to give ourselves permission to be excited for her, and let that be that.

Now Edith is a near-toddler. She's cruising, climbing, getting into things, playing with toys, stacking blocks, putting items into other items. She's figuring out things that we are still doing OT and PT exercises on with Israel. It's hard, but it's good. I'm thankful we had Israel first because we had no idea what to expect, so watching Edie learn them so fast makes every new thing a miracle to us. We are constantly amazed at her brain and how she is soaking things in, copying us, and acting more like a toddler instead of a baby each day.

The truth is, each of my children have a story to tell. The Lord is working all things for Good in each of their lives. I don't yet know what they will be, although as a mom I can daydream of what I hope for them. I hope that Israel's will continue to be a story of redemption, of how God uses Israel to display His glory. I hope for Edith, that though she is feisty, quick-learning, and silly, He will use her personality to attract others to the gospel, that she will know and love scripture and the Lord. I hope that the Lord uses the sweet, compassionate heart that Israel has to give him mercy for others.

So while sometimes it is bittersweet to see Edie's quick progress, and Israel's slower milestones, I am confident that the Lord loves both of my kiddos even more than I do. I know that God delights in them and created them purposefully. I know that no step or milestone will be done without the Lord ordaining it, and that in each moment of their lives, I can point to Christ as the giver of good gifts, and the One deserving of Glory. 


  1. Your blog is so inspiring to my wife and I. We cannot conceive and are trying our hand at adoption. We feel lost in trying to ascertain what paperwork we need to get and get filled out. Any advice for a couple that just wants a child of our own to love?



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