The Lost Weeks
Edith is two months now, which is right about how old Israel was at his referral. I was just rereading old blog posts and came across my two month letter to him. He came to Hannah's Hope at the end of November 2011, just a few short weeks after his birth.
We couldn't believe how much we loved our sweet boy instantly! But we also couldn't believe how much loss could already have occurred for a baby just 7 weeks old. I wish I knew what those "lost weeks" before Hannah's Hope were like for Israel. I trust that they were for Israel's good and that the months that my boy spent in Ethiopia before he came home will be used for God's glory. I ache to have known my Israel then- to have seen his first smile and to have seen him grow from the start. He's mine, he's always been mine in my heart.
But the thing is... those weren't lost weeks for someone else. I think about Israel's birth mom almost every day. His 2nd birthday, and Edith's birth have made me think about his birth mom even more. All she had were those weeks.
The entire first seven weeks of Edith's life, I thought about his birth mom every day. What did she think when he made cooing noises for the first time? How often did he wake up at night? I am so deeply connected to this woman I've never met. We both love our son. His story is shaped by hers.
I'm sure that my entire life, there will be seasons where I ache to know and hug his birth mom even more. Right now is one of those seasons where I wish that I could have an open adoption. I wish that I could sit down with her, look at baby pictures of Israel and comment on how fast the two years have gone.
We couldn't believe how much we loved our sweet boy instantly! But we also couldn't believe how much loss could already have occurred for a baby just 7 weeks old. I wish I knew what those "lost weeks" before Hannah's Hope were like for Israel. I trust that they were for Israel's good and that the months that my boy spent in Ethiopia before he came home will be used for God's glory. I ache to have known my Israel then- to have seen his first smile and to have seen him grow from the start. He's mine, he's always been mine in my heart.
But the thing is... those weren't lost weeks for someone else. I think about Israel's birth mom almost every day. His 2nd birthday, and Edith's birth have made me think about his birth mom even more. All she had were those weeks.
The entire first seven weeks of Edith's life, I thought about his birth mom every day. What did she think when he made cooing noises for the first time? How often did he wake up at night? I am so deeply connected to this woman I've never met. We both love our son. His story is shaped by hers.
I'm sure that my entire life, there will be seasons where I ache to know and hug his birth mom even more. Right now is one of those seasons where I wish that I could have an open adoption. I wish that I could sit down with her, look at baby pictures of Israel and comment on how fast the two years have gone.
He is one cute baby. I am trying to adopt but the adoption process in Orlando, FL is a little different than I am used to. I just hope I will be able to have another addition to our family.
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