Second Baby

I'd always heard there was a difference between the way you prepare for your first and your subsequent kids. As I was waiting (2.5 years) for Israel's arrival, there was not much else that I thought about some days. I daydreamed about what our future would look like as parents long before we got Israel's referral and knew that we'd have a little boy in our home.

With Israel's adoption, I would find myself just wandering into his nursery, even if I didn't have a reason to go in there. His nursery was ready MONTHS before we even got his referral, let alone his arrival! I felt like our life was in a constant hold as we tried not to plan too much in the future, because we didn't know when we'd get our baby, or how life could change when he came.

Things are a bit different this time. Granted, we didn't ache and anticipate Edith's arrival for years, like we did for Israel. Edith was a bit of a surprise blessing, and now we can clearly see God's sovereign timing as we look ahead to her arrival in August. With Israel, I just wanted him home RIGHT THEN, and now I can say that I am enjoying this pregnancy, and that nine months is just enough time to anticipate and prepare for her. I am excited that she will come in August and I look forward to finishing the summer by soaking in time with my family of three.

Having a child at home has changed my perspective a bit. I am excited about Edith and LOVE shopping for pink and girly things for her. I'm enjoying getting a pink and green nursery together but don't feel the pressure to hand make everything, and most of our decorations and bedding (even the crib) are borrowed. I don't feel like I have to have every gadget or baby item that is recommended for new moms. I know that life will continue to go on when she arrives and that the idea that your life can just stop for a few weeks won't be there this time (no cocooning this time!!! Grad school waits for no one).

Maybe I'm a bit idealistic about life-after-Edith, but I think that we will find our new normal, that we will make our transitions, and that whatever happens, will happen. I am not stressed about it right now and I know that she WILL survive the newborn stage and that we can make it through sleep deprivation. There are definitely things that scare me (umm delivery and breastfeeding!) but I know that women do those things all the time!

I've also found that my anticipation makes me a little sad for Israel and our relationship. I just want to snuggle him extra long and be more intentional about our time together, because pretty soon there will be another baby to divide my attention. I know every mama wrestles with this when adding to the family; I just hope that I can help Israel transition and that he will feel secure when we add Edith to the mix.Yet, I know it will work out and he won't even remember this season! It will seem to him that Edith was always there. 

So I'm sitting here, with my last few weeks of quiet before Edith comes, and I have a peaceful heart. I know that God is faithful and that things will come together. Some sweet friends of mine threw me a baby sprinkle, and I feel like I am all set on clothes and blankets and girl stuff for Edith. I know things are about to change a lot,  but in the meantime, I'm just going to focus on my first baby and my awesome husband....because that's the season I'm in right now.